Hope you had a great 2009. The Colonel will be back in 2010 to help you forget your pesky resolutions.

Cheers!

Seemed like Hot Buttered Rum Time.

2 Tablespoons ColTiki Hot Buttered Rum batter
1½ oz Rum of choice((I put out Coruba, A Martinique, and the Scarlet Ibis))
4 oz Hot Water
Fresh Nutmeg, Mace

Mix batter with 2 oz almost boiling water until dissolved. Add rum and stir while adding the last 2 oz of water. Dust with fresh ground nutmeg and mace.

Here is a teaser of things to come:

This past Thursday’s TDN was centered around Bols new launch of their Genever. It is a fabulous product. Right now it has limited availability and I look forward its expansion (and support from the OLCC, I hope). It has a mouth feel of velvet and a refined balanced flavor profile that ends in warm malty notes.

The strange late spring heat wave we’ve been having here in Portland directed me toward my concoction that I delivered to TDN. My friends Molly and Zorn (both PDX bartenders with decades of experience) introduced me to the wonder of chile peppers and fruit in cocktails. Greg Hoitsma over at Andina also has great success with Habañero and Passion Fruit (an amazing combination). I am particularly obsessed with the pineapple/lemon/simple/chile, featuring a good earthy chile such as a Jalapeño or a Serrano. For a Thai chile or birds-eye I think I might switch out the lemon for lime.

I’m very happy with the result from the below concoction. It is amongst the four finalists over at the Mixoloseum Blog. Please go over there to vote for it if you find it surpasses the competition, as I do. Also if you’re over there try out the “Malt Gasoline.” It’s a wonderful swizzle only slightly less of a winner than mine.

Photo courtesy Tiare (www.amountainofcrushedice.com)

G.V.D (godverdomme)
2 oz Bols Genever
½ oz pineapple juice (fresh, please)
½ oz lemon juice
½ oz vanilla syrup (sub simple)
few pinapple chunks
3 slices jalapeño or serrano chile
dash aromatic bitters (fee’s old fashioned, angostura, &c.)

Muddle pinapple chunks, chile, and juices. Add remaning ingredients and shake with ice to mix and form head. Double strain into cocktail glass and garnish with lemon twist (or as Tiare has in her beautiful shot, pineapple wedge and chile).

This month the Internet’s favorite all-around superb stylish talented and popular fellow, Chuck Taggart hosts May’s Mixology Monday. He’s chosen Amaro for the theme.

Italian Amaros (Amari?) are bitter liqueurs meant to stimulate digestion or alleve indigestion if need be — digestive bitters. We’re all familiar with Campari and Fernet and likely some are familiar with Cynar which is made with artichokes. The Italians have dozens (if not near past 100) more. They are usually built on wines fortified with high-alcohol extractions of botanicals, spices, and bittering agents. Amaros are current loves of stateside bartenders who are reaching for something to suit the body of the cocktail more than the traditional shake of strong aromatic bitters for the nose of the drink.

I’ve loved every amaro I’ve tried withough fail, so I though it fitting to pair my cocktail with a liquor that I’ve been fighting to develop a taste for and until only recently failed: Tequila. Try as I might to find avenues and gateways into appreciating tequila (mescal, cachaça, etc.) it was no use. This was my bane – my last liquor to conquer and I had failed. That is, until recently. It just clicked into place – it finally made sense. Much to my relief I now have another color in my pallete and this is my first recipe using the toungue-timber of the hearts of blue agave. I hope you enjoy. I pair it with two of my favorite amaros: Cynar and Averna.

Amaro Amigo

½ oz Cynar
½ oz Averna
¾ oz Tequila Ocho Plata (or other 100% blue agave blanco tequila)
½ oz blood orange juice
¼ oz lime juice
½ oz Cointreau
dash cinnamon tincture (or cinnamon heavy bitters)
dash herbsaint

Stir with ice in mixing glass and double strain into cocktail glass. Olé

Thanks to Chuck for hosting!

You’d better watch out, You’d better not cry
You’d better not pout, I’m telling you why:
Santa Claus is coming to town.

That’s really not much of a threat. I think this factor leads to my love for the dual nature of the European old (St.) Nick. The Devil coming to get you with his switch and horns and chains and claws? Yes, that the stuff. That should definitely inspire more nightmares than a lump of old coal.

Consider that nugget in the card below, where we get a close approximation to Coots’s and Gillespie’s lyrics above:

Sei nur brav und niemals keck
Dann der Krampus schaut um’s eck

Be only well-behaved and never saucy,
(for) the Krampus is looking around the corner.

He sees you when you’re sleeping. He knows when you’re awake. Gruß vom Krampus!

And Yes, I know – another post with no cocktails. Hey, this is the “indigo firmaments” part of the blog and it has been ingored a bit as of late. I do promise that by the end of the week I’ll have a new cocktail for you all: The Krampus Swizzle. 5 points for the first person to get the connection.

1. who gets coal anymore? anyone still use Christmas to punish misbehaving kids in contemporary culture?
2. other than the aspect of reduced gift volume

As a child (and still as an adult), I would spend most of my time in Adventureland and New Orleans Square; these locations drove my imagination more than any other aspect of the park. I often joke that Disneyland ruined me for my sense of decoration; I feel the over-fantastical theme and attention to detail to be the norm. You can see a basic example of this phenomenon the Monkey Hut and the Buccaneer’s Bathroom at the old house.²

But enough about that, we were talking tiki. For the 40th anniversary in 2003, artists Kevin Kidney and Jody Daily sculpted a number of mugs. You may remember Kevin from his “Miehana” mug (and accompanying beachbum recipe in “Grog Log”). I’m lucky enough to have a Pele mug from this run.

The interesting thing is that one mug that was designed was not produced: The Rongo Bowl. Humuhumu wrote about this back in 2006. Well, lucky us. The 45th anniversary was another chance at a run of production and 500 Rongo Bowls were produced. On Monday, June 23 of this past June, Disneyland hosted a collectable event offering a grand selection of 45th anniversary merchandise. I was heartbroken that I could not make it down for the event. My good friend Brian did, however. He was unbelievably kind enough to get me a Rongo Bowl of my very own.

For this great occasion, I felt a new bowl drink creation was in order. This would be my first attempt at a bowl drink, which is very exciting. Since Rongo is the god of agriculture, I felt a strong fruit forward flavor was necessary, as well as a floral and fresh aroma. After three attempts I decided upon the recipe.³

Rongo
God of Agriculture
In Tropic Lands the Legends Tell
Astounding Pioneers Did Dwell
This Wise Fella Began All-Flight
For Rongo Flew the World’s First Kite!

This bowl is deviously deceptive – there are four ounces of 80-proof spirit within. To honor Rongo’s invention of the Kite, this Rongo Bowl will send you soaring!⁴

Rongo Bowl
¾ oz orange blossom honey
¾ oz fresh lime juice
¾ oz fresh orange juice
¾ oz fresh white grapefruit juice
2 oz unsweetened pineapple juice
2 oz Dark Jamaican Rum (Coruba)
1 oz Demerara (Lemonhart 80)
1 oz Virgin Islands gold (Cruzan 2yr ‘dark’)
¼ oz orgeat
¼ oz passion fruit syrup
10 drops Herbsaint or other earthy absinthe (about 1/8th teaspoon)
3 dashes Fees Bros. old fashioned bitters

Heat honey to liquid and combine with all ingredients in mixing container. Fill Rongo bowl with crushed ice and pour into bowl. Stir with swizzle to cool and dilute. Garnish and serve.

photo and photodesign credit: Heather ‘Tikimama’ Gregg

1. Juan the “Barker Bird”, who was Jose’s cousin was originally outside, announcing the attraction. The crowds that would stand and watch him clogged the entry into Adventureland so he was removed
2. I feel these are now below what I wish to accomplish. Look soon for the plans, in-action shots, and creation stories for the new basement: “Colonel Tiki’s Cove”
3. Thanks to the help of Noel Henneman and the lovely Tikimama who were helpful in constructive criticism
4. Mary Poppins reference, “Let’s go Fly a Kite,” written by the Sherman Brothers who also wrote “The Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room” as well as numerous other works of genius

What Ten would you pick?

Here’s my Ten. May this limit never come to pass.

• J Wray 17 year old Jamaican Rum
• El Dorado 15 year old Demerara
• Mount Gay Extra Old
• Plymouth Gin
• Rittenhouse 23 year old Rye
• Lillet Blanc
• Punt e Mes
• Glenfiddich 21 year old Caribbean rum cask
• Green Chartreuse VEP
• Everclear (for making my own infusions and distillations)

Yes, that last one is kinda like asking for more wishes as the last wish. So what? I’m sneaky.

At Thatch, I’ll be giving a short Tiki Mixology seminar and offering thirteen classic and new Tiki beverages on our menu. This is what is in store for our group of intrepid Tiki Adventurers:

The weather should be in the middle 90s and sunny. Our last stop will be a home bar with a pool. I think by that time, I will be just about ready to immediately jump in.

The trend I speak of is the (to me) feigned pretentiousness of the novel. Now, I am the first to admit the joy of intellectualizing my hobbies, it is the curse of the overly educated and the lingering disease of the post-modern. However, I do try to keep a healthy grip on perspective. Yes, there is artistry and craft and great deep involvement of the minutia of flavor profiles; the alchemy of taste! However, for crying out loud, It’s just food / drink.

There’s no reason it can’t be both: I’m comfortable and (candidly) revel in ambiguity and cognitive dissonance. Aristotle may be wrong; “a” can equal “not a.” And yes, below I’ll be generalizing and paint with wide strokes:

For instance, The slow food movement. While wonderful and aligned with my own tastes and political leanings, etc. As explained to my mother-in-law, she replied: “Oh, you mean food?” You know, like your grandparents used to eat before the 50′s tech marvel fads of highways, distribution, production, suburbs and supermarkets changed things?

Canning, preserving, smoking, curing, head-to-tail: What your great-grandmother used to call “Wednesday.”

etc.

I do not mean to malign the renaissance of foodcraft (or any craft, for that matter). Nor do I wish to marginalize the wonder of discovery of these lost arts. I do however have my fill of those who are so god-damned pretentious about them. I wish we could stop pretending to be so god damned expectant of external validation of our personal growth in discovery. That’s all.

I mean, I know our damn generation has to deign irony or some other handle to deal with the fact that we’re broke and our market system is imploding and so we’re drinking Pabst and making mac and cheese (with local non-hormone artisan cheese). But really? Really? You don’t get a god-damned gold star no matter how well you can use the macro setting on your new digital camera. I’ll thank you for the recipes, though. They’re super tasty.